Monday, February 27, 2012

Cupid Sucks.

Princess has a new boyfriend.
The boy is a guy she met at
camp last summer.  He lives in TX
and we live in LA.  With 4 hrs
of pavement between they
have seen each other twice since
camp, last July.

Truthfully, I don't see what the attraction
is.  They seem to have nothing in common
except the fact that they are both 17.
Honestly, there is nothing wrong with
the kid, but really nothing special about
him either. (Just being totally honest here.)

He mailed her a present for Christmas
and had chocolates shipped here
for Valentines.  They keep connected
via phone and FB. That's been it
until this past weekend. . .

This weekend the "family" came to
our fair city for the weekend, to meet
Princess and her family.
They (their entire family) took Princess
to dinner on Friday night, then
Princess & boyfriend went to a movie
by themself...Saturday Princess spent
the entire day with his "family" as they
explored our town.  She and boyfriend
came back to our house for dinner
then watched a movie here - parents
picked up the boyfriend at 10.
Princess informed us that he and his
"family" would be attending church
with us Sunday morning and then we
were to all go out to lunch together
before the "family" headed back to
Texas...Let the record show that
the family (Mom, Dad, and Sister)
all seemed quite normal and very nice.

But, doesn't this seem like a bit of
over-kill for two kids who are basically
semi-dating?  It seems like this is the
sort of thing one does when one's
children are seriously dating/getting
engaged. etc.

Princess is our 4th child and though
we are sometimes a bit on the over-
protective side, this really all seemed
a bit "much", even to us.  It felt
as though we were caught in the
movie, "Meet the Fockers".
I'd really like to see this relationship
nixed, but, as is human behavior,
the more I say about it the more she
hangs in there with him.  I've said very
little about this to her but I will say even
less in the future, however she does
know I felel their presence was kind of
an uninvited intrusion on our weekend.

I don't think I've ever had an issue with
anyone our other (older) kids have dated.
But with Princess I can't say the same.
She's about 50/50. 

This is the snarky side of me speaking.
I admit this is judgemental.
I admit this is even a little unfair
I also admit I am thankful for the
"four hours of pavment between
his house and ours".

I may not always be nice
but I am always honest.
Cupid sucks.


Shelly said...

Ha! I can empathize now that our teenager has starting having friends who are boys. (Sounds better to say it like that than boyfriends.)

Handsome's wife said...

I agree. I seems a bit much. Let them date but as a parent I would never feel the need to drive my child 4 hours and then all the additional cost just for casual dating online...I think it speaks volumes to how parent are over the top now a days.

Angie said...

Oh man! You had me reliving some moments from my oldest daughter's past. I'm in a lull at the moment on the boyfriend/girlfriend scene, although my 18 yr old son hangs around some sisters & their mom at church and I just don't like it. No good reason, just don't. I tried to talk my hubs into pulling him away from the girl huddle last night and he asked why. I replied, "Don't know; just don't like it." He gave me the eye roll and walked away. :)

Oh, the drama! Just feeling your pain today. I agree Cupid often sucks.

My Mind's Eye said...

WOW...I'm quite surprised his parents agreed to this trip especially w/o talking to you all first. It is overboard!! Geez what will he do for an encore. I can't believe I'm saying this but, in my day this type of visiting only took place after a ring was on the finger.
Hugs C

Sunny Simple Life said...

Oh how funny we are the same. We don't want anything to do with the parents until someone is engaged. That is how it was with our folks. Helicopter parents these days. I find especially with boys, some of the parents are ridiculous. Let these kids grow up find their way like we did. I like to meet the boys of course as my hubby is 6'4" and I like a little intimidation as we have four daughters. In total agreement. I would have died.

NanaDiana said...

Okay- So I think this is just a little WEIRD! I think it is kind of overstepping the boundaries a bit. And, if something makes you uncomfortable you should definitely listen to those nudges even if you can't put your finger on it. Hopefully, with time and space the relationship will die a natural death. I hope she meets someone locally that gives her a reason to drop the "other guy". xo Diana

Sandy aka Doris the Great said...

I think it's a huge bonus to have teenagers with long distance relationships. Saves all the hassle and garbage that can happen when they live close together and are constantly with each other.

And speaking as a Mom that has come out the other end of teenage dating experiences, that's my opinion on the matter!

Rhona said...

Hmmm... I'd find that a bit OTT. I could understand them bringing him if they were going that way anyway but not specifically to meet the girlfriend and expecting to meet the parents as well -really????? Hope someone new comes along soon xx

Nonnie said...

I'm trying to visualize that ever happening with one of our kids. Driving four hours to take your teen for a weekend visit? I don't think so. Strange to me.

Nonnie said...

I'm trying to visualize that ever happening with one of our kids. Driving four hours to take your teen for a weekend visit? I don't think so. Strange to me.

Joyce said...

I think the only way it wouldn't feel strange was if they had some other reason for coming to your town and they worked a visit around that. To make a special trip at that age and under the circumstances definitely seems like too much.

Nel said...

I am with Joyce, if they were coming for another reason then it would be more understandable. Otherwise a little over the top. If it was just for their benefit then I would say he is probably spoiled and used to always getting his way. So next visit is your turn, when did you say you was going...lolol
until next time... nel

Sush said...

As the Mother of four boys, lol now grown and happily married and one daughter at the tail end, I think this is NUTS! I felt with the boys I was trying to turn down the volume on the girls in high school and sometimes their mothers. Had one Mom whom I'd never met drive over with four girls and her daughter just so they could 'see' our youngest son. Weird.
My daughter observed a lot of this and now turns the volume down herself on the boys that rush in too fast. At 24 she is still holding to high standards and is not interested in the overkill boys. Amen...
I hope Princess gets bored really fast with this one!

yaya said...

Hmmm...I think a totally new camp is needed for next year. One in Europe with an ocean between. I would never drive my sons (when they were teens) to any girls home to meet the parents. I wasn't even thrilled to meet the other "family" when engagements were happening. I still don't meet the kid's in-laws except during Grandkiddos bday parties...this sounds very weird...and desperate. I'd ride this one out for now and maybe she'll get the picture for herself.

Kelli said...

Wow. Just....WOW. I totally hear what you're saying and I agree. That is going totally overboard. Unless they did have another reason for coming to town and his seeing your Princess was simply an added benefit to the trip, I have to wonder what on earth his parents were thinking to do such a thing! I agree that you should say little but keep a close eye on the situation...and hope it passes.

Country Wings in Phoenix said...

Oh Sweetie...
I am right there with you. This does sound a little like Meet the Fockers. I was so LOL. You are just so darn cute. I am so surprised that the parents didn't check with you first before planning the trip. Sort of like something out of the Twilight Zone.

Have you considered an all girls camp for this Summer?

Take a deep breath sweetie and have a great week. Many hugs and much love, Sherry

Chatty Crone said...

You are entering a zone I'm glad I'm out of right now! sandie

Unknown said...

I think I'm glad that my oldest is only 13...JUST TURNED 13...because I'm not ready for any of THAT. ;)

(Thanks for stopping in my blog!)

momof3girls said...

Seems a bit overkill

Cheryl @ TFD said...

Wow, times have changed in the dating arena. There is no way I would have taken my 17 year old son that far to meet parents and so he could go out with a girl. But then, I can't believe a lot of the things I see that parents let their children do or do for them these days. Over the top for sure!

Mandy said...

No really some parents are an over kill...My 16 had a BF and HIS MOTHER kept ringing her all the time....Me I don't like any of the boyfriends....hey at least they know where they stand....

The Old Dairy said...

OK had the wrong account on...Just so you know it was me before...

karen said...

I tried to never get attached to anyone who wasn't a fiance or fiancee. It's too exhausting getting attached to the many boyfriends and girlfriends. Half the time I'm more upset when they get ditched than my son or daughter was! I can see that isn't the case with this young man so my advice is to just detach. It will end soon enough - four hours is a lot to overcome.

bj said...

Now, Sweet Tea, I totally and 200 percent agree with you. They are waaaay too young, first of all, to have his parents move in on your weekend. It is downright strange to me. Who drives their 17 yr. old son to see a girl, 4 HOURS away, and spends the entire weekend? Just doesn't seem right to me, either.
Why did they not check with you first, I wonder.
Oh, well, hopefully, this "romance" will die soon....:)

The Brown Recluse (TBR) said...

I won't even tell you about my coworker and how far she flew to take her son to meet his internet girlfriend. You wouldn't believe me, but it's a book waiting to be written...

I think you are handling the situation the very best way possible, because you are so right: the more you express displeasure about it, the more it will prolong the agony. Something attractive about opposition from the parental units, I think.

Good luck with it...I'm so glad mine is out of her teens! Wouldn't trade ya for nothing!!

~Anchored In Christ~ said...

at age 17 if that's what you said she is. I dont remember really being interested in boys really. I was worried about driving and hanging with friends. going shopping and hanging with friends and seeing movies and all. I am almost 29 and just started dating guys and I dont think i could take a long distance relationship. boys are complicated and half of them dont know what they want.

nancygrayce said...

As someone who got pregnant and married at age 17.....I say stick to your guns mama! I was a young Christian girl with Christian parents and I knew better. Pressure from a boy and temptation is just too much for a 17 year old's heart.

Goodness, I don't envy you this trip down dating lane!

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